After having visited St. Michaels Mount on a wet and windy
April afternoon we drove back to Kingsand absolutely famished, and were tempted
by the signs on the B road advertising the Liscawn Inn. After traversing the long
and sinuous drive down we arrived at a
rather deserted looking hotel. It felt like the entrance to a mansion in a
hammer horror movie, albeit without the mist. And we were the only guests. As I
ventured into the bar restaurant it felt as if I had been thrust back 40 years
in a time warp, the patterned carpet and fake Hansel and Gretel furniture reminiscent
of the 70s. A long haired moustachiod capro driving playboy with collars down
to his ankles flanked by two bimbos in mini skirts would not have looked out of
place here. I asked a rather lonely looking barman,
reading his newspaper at the bar, whether the establishment was open for food. He
agreed and I brought my mother in who was waiting in the car. The menu looked interesting enough, beef bourgignon, sirloin
or rump steak, various fish dishes and breast of chicken in a very Mediterranean
sounding sauce. I plumped for the sirloin while my mother chose the chicken. The
sirloin was OK, if a bit unimaginative, but then that was what cooking was like
in Britain back in the 70s, which is where we obviously were. The chicken my
mother chose, however, was submerged in a ghastly floury mushroom sauce, which
my mother simply described as revolting. The vegetables were given the basic steamed
treatment, nothing fancy here in a place where garnish meant two solitary
stalks of cress. My mother managed two mouthfuls before making an excuse about
a bug she caught a few days before. The only white available was pinot, so she
chose to accompany it with a merlot which was undersized and served in a small
and very grubby glass. If you are nostalgic and like the 70s come here for a time
warp. Personally, I like to think Britain has moved on culinarily from those
times, and when people thought that the only French mustard really was what
Colman's tried to tell you it was. read more