Looking to try something new, we walked in here, tempted by the sign outside promising breakfast from 9.30am on a weekend. The place looks fantastic - it used to be a butchers, so has tiled walls and a very cool tiled alcove at the end with the till and the wine stored in it.
We walked in and waited in the doorway like good customers. Nothing. So we walked in a little further and coughed. Nothing. I walked over to the kitchen and cleared my throat. Nothing. So I yelled "hello!" at the nearest guy. Still nothing! He was not 3 feet away from me and didn't respond!
Eventually after entering the kitchen, stripping and doing a tap dance (ok, that was exaggerating just a leetle bit) I finally got the attention of a chap and asked if they were open. "Yes." was the response. "Great, could we have a table please?" I asked. "Sure" was the reply. So, I went off, found some menus and sat down at a table in the front with my brother. A French woman came out about 15 minutes later and seemed a little surprised that we were there. She was rather frosty. Very very cold and in fact 'icy' wouldn't be a bad way to describe the welcome she gave us.
When I asked for a cappuccino with skimmed milk, she just stared at me and said "Non". "Semi Skimmed?" I asked hopefully. "Non." came the reply. "Thees ees a French restaurant. We use la creme, not la skimmed milk". Ok, just a black coffee then!
We ordered breakfasts - full English, my brother's without eggs, but perhaps a extra sausage or rasher of bacon instead? "Non." Ok then!
My brother then dashed across to the co-op over the road and bought me a pint of skimmed milk. (He's the best brother in the world!) While he was gone, Madame Snowball came back in and asked how he would like his eggs. "Er, not at all actually". The light of realisation dawned. "Ah, Per'aps eee would like an extra sausage or bacon?" I smiled. "That would be lovely, thank you!".
When it arrived, the breakfast was absolutely superb. They remembered that I asked for cold beans (I know, I'm a weirdo), they substituted a sausage for the eggs and the whole thing was lovely. The only thing that would make it better would have been two rounds of toast instead of one, to mop up the vast quantity of beans they give you.
They even refilled my coffee completely free of charge and knocked off 25p from my brother's breakfast, as apparently one sausage is 25p cheaper than two eggs!
I left them the rest of the skimmed milk, in case another customer was also wanting something a little lighter, but I saw frosty the snow-madame hold it up and look at it with wonder. Ah, those English, with the cold baked beans and the fat-free milk. Pah! read more