I am writing to express my deep disappointment with our experience this past season at Lava…read moreVolleyball Club. While I had hoped this would be a season of growth and confidence-building for my daughter, it instead became a frustrating and disheartening experience -- not only for her, but for us as a family.
From the very beginning, it was apparent that the head coach fostered an environment where mistakes were not used as learning opportunities but as reasons for ridicule. It became clear that when players made errors, they were often met with sarcasm or mockery. As a parent, I wanted to speak up earlier, but out of respect for my daughter's wishes and her fear of retaliation -- which, given the environment, I believe was a valid concern -- I refrained.
Communication from the coaching staff was minimal and ineffective. In fact, parents were explicitly asked to direct any questions through the players themselves, which put undue pressure on the kids and left parents out of the loop. There was also never any mention or effort made toward team bonding, which is so important for a positive and cohesive experience -- especially at this developmental level.
When the head coach was absent, the assistant coach maintained a more positive dynamic. However, even then, the tone among the team seemed immature and cliquish, which I understand may stem from the young age and inexperience of the head coach.
The final straw for me, and what compelled me to write this letter, was our trip to Las Vegas. While my daughter played the first day, she was benched the second day after missing one serve -- a single mistake that immediately led to her removal from the game. To make matters worse, the head coach was overheard telling the assistant coach that she wouldn't be playing my daughter anymore -- loud enough for her to hear. She didn't play the rest of that game or the one after. When my daughter respectfully asked why, she was told it was because she missed her serve.
All players missed serves throughout the tournament, yet none were sidelined as she was. She was later told she might play again -- but not in her usual position. In the third game, she was put in a position she had never played, clearly unprepared and set up to fail. Despite her effort, it felt punitive, not developmental.
If statistics were kept, I am confident they would show that my daughter was not the weakest player on the team. Additionally, she was reprimanded for being on her phone before warm-ups, yet others who did the same were not held to the same standard. It was inconsistent and unfair.
What hurts the most is that instead of building her up, this coach tore down her confidence. She took what should have been a highlight of the season and turned it into an embarrassment for my daughter. This is the opposite of what a youth sports coach should represent.
I sincerely hope that my voice is heard, not just for my daughter, but for future players. If I am the first to bring this to your attention, I doubt I will be the last. I urge you to reevaluate the coaching approach and the emotional support being offered to these young athletes. They deserve to grow in confidence and skill -- not be made to feel small for trying.