I came to The Refuge specifically for trauma treatment. I was referred and admitted for CPTSD, body…read moredysmorphic disorder, agoraphobia, and multiple panic and anxiety disorders. Body dysmorphic disorder is an important part of this story because it has nothing to do with food or eating, and you would think staff at a trauma-informed facility would know that.
The most consistently positive part of my stay was the other clients in the trauma community. They were kind, supportive, and genuinely looked out for one another. The food was good, and the cabins were fine overall, though there was some mold.
Group therapy ran all day, which is typical for a trauma program, but a lot of the groups were very poorly facilitated. Many times, groups did not even have someone assigned to run them. Yes, this took place over the Thanksgiving holiday, but as a treatment center, you know you still have clients who need care. Staffing and group coverage should have been addressed and organized well in advance of the holiday.
Where things went seriously wrong was with placement and leadership. After arriving and doing well in the trauma community, I was suddenly told I was being placed in Oak House, the eating disorder unit, even though I do not have an eating disorder. No one gave me a reason. I was abruptly removed from the trauma program and placed in a highly restrictive unit with daily weigh-ins, locked bathrooms, monitored showers, plated meals, and constant escorts -- none of which matched my diagnoses.
I reported to my therapist that I was concerned about my safety while in Oak House. She told me she escalated my concerns to leadership, but no corrective action was taken.
In a subsequent meeting with the clinical director, Shelly, I again asked why I had been placed in the eating disorder unit. Instead of answering, she deflected my questions. When I tried to explain why I did not belong there -- that I do not have an eating disorder and that body dysmorphic disorder has nothing to do with food -- she told me my questions were a "trauma response."
As a psychology major with a 4.0 GPA, I know what a trauma response is. I told her directly that this was not one. This was one adult asking another adult for an explanation about a clear misplacement, and she was not able or willing to give me an answer.
I was ultimately given an ultimatum: return to Oak House or leave the facility that night, even though I was over a thousand miles from home. I was also told I could not use a phone to call my husband unless I agreed to return to Oak House first. I went back only long enough to use the landline to arrange a ride home. Thankfully, I had a friend nearby who dropped everything to come get me.
I am thankful for the other clients. But the placement decisions, lack of transparency, poor planning, and leadership response were confusing, dismissive, and not trauma-informed. People seeking trauma treatment deserve clear communication, respect, and care that actually aligns with their diagnoses
