John Chang was hired by the City of Sunnyvale to teach Self Defense for Kids classes at one of…read moretheir summer camps. My daughter was in his class for less than an hour on one day last year; she was uncomfortable with the way he spoke to her, and with how he re-positioned her body. I have taught her that she doesn't have to do things that make her uncomfortable, and that her body is her own, and no one has the right to touch it without her consent. As such, we removed her from the class, as it was clearly a poor fit between student and instructor.
This year, my daughter is at the same camp, but not registered in Mr. Chang's classes. He brought a snow cone machine to the camp, gave the students in his class snow cones, and then offered them for sale to the kids outside of his class. Because the camp was not informed of his intent to sell snow cones*, neither were the parents, and many kids did not have money to purchase. Mr. Chang told other coaches/instructors that, for the kids without cash, they could pick a camper who was very well-behaved to receive a free cone. A coach chose my daughter, which speaks to how well-behaved and agreeable she is.
When my daughter went up to receive her cone, Mr. Chang asked if she were the student who stopped taking his class last year. She said yes. He then told her she wasn't good, and refused to give her the cone. She retreated, embarrassed, hurt, shamed, and in tears. She asked her other coach for space, and wept quietly until she pulled herself together and re-joined her group. She didn't complain, whine, or get angry.
I approached Mr. Chang the next day to speak with him. He said that, a year ago, she "spoke down to him." I said, "She spoke down to you?! She is a child!" He clarified that she didn't listen when he told her to do things -- that ONE day, in that ONE class, for less than an hour, after her initial attempts left her uncomfortable. I applaud her for this: it's a children's recreational summer camp, not an army, and she was not comfortable acting on his orders or being touched by him. She didn't talk back to or sass him.
For a grown man to hold a grudge like this with a child for an entire year, and punish her for it publicly, is ridiculous and petty. Even IF my child had been rude or disrespectful to him a year ago, her other coach identified her as well-behaved and deserving THIS year.
This isn't about the snow cone, and it's not about martial arts or self-defense. This is about an instructor whose focus is on authority at all costs, who is insensitive and unkind, who holds grudges against children, and who expects respect but doesn't offer any. If your parenting style is one of absolute authority, obedience, and discipline, you might get along with him well. For those of us who teach self-awareness, self-protection, and empathy, I strongly recommend avoiding his teaching.
* Soliciting children for money is not allowed at the camps. Had Mr. Chang requested permission to do this, he would have been denied.