I had a very upsetting experience at Mother's Lounge during pub quiz night…read more
I am autistic. I arrived late, did not have a team, and was standing alone in the corner trying to be unobtrusive. There was a small stage with a folding table where the quiz host was asking questions. Between questions, music would play while people wrote down answers, and I was singing along quietly.
Staff told me to move away from the stage, and I did. Then they told me I was not allowed to sing along with the songs between questions and called it disruptive. The situation escalated from there.
The context matters.This was a bar that does karaoke regularly, and there was already a loud song playing between quiz questions while people were writing down answers. I was singing along to music that was already in the room, not trying to interrupt the quiz or perform over anyone. I also stood as far away from the quiz participants as I could without going outside, and when I sang louder than softly, I turned toward the wall/corner because I was trying not to project into the room. Maybe the sound carried more than I realized, but my intention and my behavior were not careless or hostile.
When I became visibly upset, they threatened to call the police if I did not leave immediately. I said I needed five minutes to gather myself and my belongings. They refused and told me I had to leave right then or they would call the cops. That is when I raised my voice.
I understand venues have rules. But there is a big difference between enforcing rules and escalating an overwhelmed disabled customer who is trying to comply.
This was humiliating and frightening, and I hope ownership takes disability awareness and de-escalation seriously.
