Take a hefty dose of John Cougar Mellencamp's "Small Town" and mix in a dollop of Alice Cooper's "Welcome to My Nightmare" and you have the Armada Fair. I went last week to see the demolition derby, and should have got their a lot earlier cause the stands were packed to the gills! People were crammed into all kinds of super low clearance spots underneath with partial to poor visibility just to see 'em wreck 'em up. I tried to make a go of it, but these were spots made for teenagers having sex and/or smoking pot or for bums scavenging for returnables, not for trying to take in a brutal motor sports spectacle.
I was also rolling solo, since Ely cancelled out. No matter, I saw the sights, got in some good people watching, and never really felt too out of place as a lone city boy. This was my 3rd or 4th time at the Armada Fair, and first since I was a teen. (I can't remember if I went once or twice as a kid. I think twice.)
The food is greasy and the lines can be long. Some of the tents with farm animals smell exactly like you'd expect them to smell. They had a rock and roll cover band and they did a very serviceable rendition of Johnny B. Good. Some of the art in the arts and crafts tent was really good and the rest was all very earnest. And I only saw one piece of Trump gear all day which I took as a good sign.
I rode some classic flat rides with the $25 all day wristband, though at times I felt like a creepazoid, like when they put me on a Ferris wheel car with 3 kids I didn't know. They listened to their parents, didn't talk to a stranger, and I didn't talk to them. They were way geeked about the demo Derby, and why shouldn't they be? If you couldn't get into the packed stands, the regular Ferris wheel and the more thrilling skywheel were the best places to catch glimpses, both extended and short, of it.
I hit the classic Himalaya a couple of times, Ring of Fire twice, Scrambler once, Skywheel twice, Ferris wheel once, pirate boat once, circular swing ride twice and the zero gravity once. (Gravitron used to sound way cooler.) I tried to go on the Zipper but got walk of shamed off cause they wouldn't board single riders. I avoided the Extreme swinging pendulum as it was the only ride with a more than two cycle wait and I had just watched the YouTube video of a similar ride breaking apart at the Ohio state fair with fatal consequences earlier in the day.
Parking is a chore but I managed to score a free spot in the downtown business district that was probably more than half a mile away. I didn't mind the walk. There were big queues to get into the lots that were closer and I had to get to that demo Derby! First time I saw one, by the way, even if I didn't see close to all of it. I saw some cars get crunched up beyond all repair all right. read more