So... just before the fall of Saigon, in April of '75, an 8-day old baby girl was evacuated as part of Operation Babylift, and flown to the US of A, where she was processed through the Presidio, of all places.
Her barren, WASPy parents were hysterical with joy when they were notified that they could pick up their newborn [first] child, and to this day, with minimal encouragement, will gleefully recount the momentous first diaper change... which took place in the parking lot of a Bank of America.
This war orphan would be given the only monosyllabic name in the family, and later beg for a legal name change, to something more exotic, like "Anastasia" or "Katrine". WASPy parents would shake their heads and say, "But we like the name Kim!" despite the fact that it would forever haunt her at Korean-owned Delicatessens and dry cleaners across the country.
"Kim is my fist name, not my last name, and I'm not Korean - I'm Vietnamese."
Mani-Pedi's were also an ordeal for non-Vietnamese speaking Kim who sounded every bit the WASP that her upbringing afforded her. She loathed the inevitable interrogation from the Vietnamese manicurists. "Are you Korean?"
"No. I was born in Vietnam, but I'm adopted, so I don't speak Vietnamese," her answer always followed by the rapid dissemination of this highly personal information and conjecture/speculation/judgment by the manicurists. In Vietnamese.
You see, the WASPy parents were pathologically protective of Kim, and insulated her from all things Vietnamese, because of a legal snafu that resulted in a delay of the official adoption until she was 2 1/2 years old. The first movie Kim ever saw about Vietnam was Forrest Gump.
But non-Korean, Spanish-speaking, German-last-name-having Kim would eventually rebel, and learn to use chopsticks at the tender age of 18, soon thereafter refusing to eat "Chinese food for white people" at her parent's favorite Chinese Food for White People restaurant.
Then, in 2003, Kim decided to return to Vietnam, to forge a connection with the land of her birth. She briefly contemplated changing her name to "Kim X" but decided that two monosyllabic names were worse than one.
The Vietnamese Consulate in San Francisco was very accommodating in issuing an expedited visa, and for that, Kim was grateful.
The trip was profound and awesome in ways that cannot be described in fewer than 5,000 characters as allotted by Yelp, so suffice it to say, Kim wants to return, with Cadet and Caveman in tow, so that they can experience the whole Vietnam thing. Plus, Anthony Bourdain loves the country, the food and the people... and Kim has a terrible crush on Tony. It's a no-brainer.
Kim thought for sure that she was a candidate for dual citizenship, since she was, for all intents and purposes a displaced person, and did not leave of her own volition. And why wouldn't the Vietnamese want Kim and her family to return and funnel their hard-earned American dollars into their economy?
Emailing the Consulate did not result in any response, whatsoever. Many of the FAQ's on the website were written in Vietnamese, which did Kim absolutely no good at all. Attempts to call the Consulate resulted in dozens of busy/unavailable messages and vexed Kim to no end. When she was finally able to speak to a live human being, she was informed that she could become a Vietnamese citizen - IF she renounced her American citizenship.
Kim was indignant. Though she did consider it for one brief moment, noting that she could augment her Things That Make My Parents Cringe List. "What??? You renounced your citizenship and are a Communist now?"
How could the Vietnamese Government NOT want the outspoken hotness that is Kim D.? Her response?
No mi importa. Soy Americana, biyatches! read more