I made the mistake of taking my 15 year old dog for a quality of life check up, and it was her first visit here. We stopped going to the previous vet because they didn't see an obvious bone break on an X-ray (the U of M saw it on the same X-ray) and never seemed to remember anything about our 3 dogs.
My oldest dog had been suffering from a collapsing trachea for almost a year and she declined quickly. By the time I made the appt, I had accepted that it was near the end of my pet's life; even though Rilo was still herself between coughing/collapsing episodes. In the last month, she had started to faint/collapse/stroke/seize? after her coughing fits; while urinating a couple times.
It's Covid, so animals are taken in w/out the owners and they call you; I hate it. She was in there for 1.5 hrs alone. The vet tells me her heart & lungs sound good, and she has severe trachea collapse. She still eats, drinks, and is interactive so it's not her time to go yet. Vet said she has severe dental disease, and it probably hurts to eat and she may be causing her weakness/falling. She gave us cough suppressants and a piece of paper about home euthanasia, as well as a glimmer of hope that my baby had more time. Lastly, vet says if she falls over and is unconscious for more than a minute, to call the animal hospital. I had gone to appt expecting to be told to end her suffering in the next few days.
As I drove out of the parking lot, my dog had a coughing fit and falls over limp and defecated, I thought I lost her right there. I pulled over and called the vet (I was 5 blocks away) and no one answered, so I raced home. She perked up by then and ate and drank, and was never unconscious, just dazed. I still had the vet's words in my head and weeks of cough suppressants-I had false hope we had more time.
Rilo got worse the next night; drastically. I called and left a message and no return call. She continued to have coughing/collapsing episodes, and pooped and threw up a couple times and I could tell she was suffering. I should have taken her to ER, but that didn't register with me. I made her comfortable and called for a home euthanasia appt for the next night. 3 hours later she had an episode and stopped breathing. She died within 55 hours of her vet appt, where I was told it wasn't her time yet. I failed her because I didn't end her suffering, because I trusted the word of a vet I had never met, because it didn't register to go to the emergency vet to save her from suffering because I didn't understand her illness and all her end-of-life symptoms. I wasn't prepared to know the signs; I kept focusing on the time between her episodes. She was acting like herself.
After her traumatic end, I researched tracheal collapse, quality of life & signs death is near. Rilo checked lots of those boxes, but I wasn't informed on what to look for. There was no transparency of how her disease would kill her or to go to an ER vet for emergency euthanizing. I thought I had more time before the home euthanasia. I had previously accepted she would pass peacefully and she didn't.
I have extreme guilt on how the end of my pet's life was. At this point; I feel like I'll never get over it. My mind was in a weird pre-grieving spot, and I didn't get the right guidance and knowledge. I had never dealt with losing a pet firsthand, and I am ashamed I didn't do my own research until it was too late. Maybe if they had answered their phones/returned voicemails, they could have given me guidance. I was in a state of shock about losing her. We rely on doctors to give us all the information to be prepared. She had all the signs of nearing death and the vet missed them all, and I trusted their advice. I'm devastated and I failed my pet in many ways.
I can't help but think the vet visit had something to do with this. Before the visit Rilo was collapsing 1-2 times a week. After visit she was passing out every 4 hours while vomiting and pooping. Did they press too hard? How does a vet not realize the collapsing was fainting because of her trachea? Brand new? Incompetent? read more