Listen, I know that everyone is all a-twitter about the wild animals getting set loose and possibly posing a very real threat to the local citizenry of Zanesville, but there's something you all need to realize: TERRY THOMPSON AIN'T CARE.
Terry ran one hell of a business, which I personally patronized for 6 years. No matter what I needed, he always went above and beyond to see that I left happy. You want a Harley FX1 with a side-mounted minigun? TERRY GOT YOU. A Yamaha YZF-R6 and an uzi, but don't want to go to another business to find that pet Kodiak bear that the missus has been nagging you about? TERRY GOT YOU. Did I *need* a Honda Valkyrie with a sidecar, with a direwolf in the sidecar, with that direwolf equipped with a grenade launcher strapped to his back? Yes, yes I did. And you know what? TERRY. GOT. ME. He would've gotten you, too, if only you fools had bothered to ask.
Farewell, sweet prince. This cruel world was never meant for one so beautiful as you.
PS - minus 2 stars bc that direwolf was totally not as big a fan of peanut butter as Terry promised. read more