I'm writing an update because of a bizarre turn of events…read more
So, I'm taking a nap, because that is the sort of thing I do, when the phone rings. It is 6:24. I ignored it because I was taking a nap. Then the phone rings again at 6:31. I got up and looked at the caller ID and saw it was Celestial Landscaping. I decided not to answer it and tried to go back to bed. Only to be awoken again at 6:57. Again, it was Celestial Landscaping so I ignored it again. Per Celestial Landscaping standard operating procedure, he left no voice messages. And then at 7:03 the phone rang again, and this time I answered it. It was Caesar from Celestial Landscaping.
I asked Caesar how I could help him. He started telling me how he bought me free mulch, and how he paid for my plants. OK, I said, but what do you want? Why are you calling me? He said that my review was a lie because I didn't tell all the details.
So Caesar wants a full recounting of our business dealings, I am happy to provide it. Here we go!
First, I mentioned that he called four times tonight and didn't leave a voicemail. That is the way Caesar operates. He never left voicemails. So when he would disappear for days or even weeks at a time, we got no explanation. I suppose it's possible he tried to call and explain why he wasn't there, but since he never left voicemails, I never got those explanations until I tracked him down and got hold of him. Then I would get responses like "Oh, I tried to call but I didn't get anyone."
He kept talking about how he thought our dealing were fair. When he paused for breath, I again asked him what he wanted. He said my review was a lie. He was very insistent I include: apparently, the reason he disappeared for a month was because his tools got stolen. I found that out when my husband called him after he had disappeared for a few weeks. At that point, he explained that his tools got stolen, and that he couldn't return to work on my walkway until he got approved for credit cards so he could buy new tools. OK, I guess that story sounds vaguely plausible, so let's assume it's true. It still would have been nice if he had called me and told me instead of just vanishing until I tracked him down. I don't know much about the kind of tools that get used to cut brick, but I guess they can't be rented or borrowed, and I guess Celestial Landscaping doesn't have insurance on the tools or business or enough cash flow to buy replacements. Things I wish I had known before I hired them.
Also, Caesar wants me to mention that he bought me mulch and plants. Now, keep in mind that he quoted me a price for the entire job including supplies, so that seems to me a little like saying "And I bought myself lunch every day so I had enough strength to do the work." You're doing me a favor by buying the stuff you need to buy in order to do the job you said you'd do? As for the plants, we asked him to plant wild grasses, wildflowers, daisies, and black-eyed susans. But he insisted he needed us to go with him. I told him in the interview I didn't know anything and I didn't really want to be involved in the day to day work. I asked him then, You're going to take care of everything, right? And he assured me he would. At the interview he did come up with a good idea about the shape of the walkway. Anyway, he just went on and on about how we had to come with him to pick the plants. We went to the nursery and picked out all of these plants. Then he tried to make me pay for them. The contract stated he would buy the plants. As well, he said he would buy the plants and the mulch to make up for disappearing for days at a time. When we insisted he pay for them, he relented, but only reluctantly. So we left while he paid for the plants, and surprise, surprise! He didn't actually buy the black eyed susans. And he planted the daisies very poorly - they are all dying or dead. When I pointed this out to him tonight, he claimed I wasn't watering them. Sorry, Caesar - we've been watering them consistently, so that's not why they are dying.
So, to Caesar, I hope I have included all the details you wanted included, but if I didn't, TOO BAD AND DO NOT CALL ME AGAIN BECAUSE IT'S REALLY CREEPY!!! And to Jesus D., who I am sure is a totally different person from Caesar, and who claims I am making up stories, how would you even know what happened? Are you my neighbor? A different customer of Caesar's who parked across the street from my house and watched Celestial do the job off and on, over the course of about three months? Or are you perhaps someone affiliated with Celestial Landscaping trying to falsely boost their star rating? Just a thought
