Sunshine is caring, experienced and knowledgeable. She puts a lot of effort into being up to date with the latest research into pregnancy, which helps her to offer us parents a range of solid choices that best fit our situation. Sunshine is a calm, strong midwife that firmly believes mothers should be in control of their birth experiences. All information regarding your health and the health of the baby is transparently shared and explained - this helps a lot to make the best possible choices, and to feel that your are working together with your midwife rarher than being told what to do.
As a person, Sunshine is warm, loving, sensitive and strong willed. As a midwife, she is a bit disorganised with paperwork, but a very solid presence and a great source of strength when we need it most. Sunshine also has a very close relationship with other midwives in the area, which I think helps a lot with the flow of information and also in case for whatever reason a back-up person might be needed.
We had a water birth at home for our daughter, our second child. Sunshine took over from our gynecologist around 4 months into my pregnancy. It was wonderful to be treated as a person and empowered to birth the way we wanted rather than being restrained and forced to fit with a medical system that treats mothers like cattle that must follow almost an industrial birthing process. Hospitals are wonderful places for sick people to recover, or in case of emergency, but pregnancy is not an illness and coming from a country where home birth is encouraged for the well being of mother and child, I had a hard time imagining myself naked, vulnerable and ill-informed surrounded by people whose first priority wasn't me or my child, but their income and schedule. With Sunshine the answers I was looking for were always there:
- Can I give birth in the water? Yes
- Can I move around in labour and give birth upright without machines attached to me? Yes
- Can I have a birth that is intimate, calm, where I can concentrate on listening to my body rather than the nurses coming in and out, where my baby's heart rate is monitored, where there is no time deadline to meet as long as the baby and myself are doing well and willing to keep working? Yes
It is expensive to have a home birth in the USA, or a midwife you can trust even if you have to give birth in hospital for whatever reason. Birth should be hard work, and yes, painful in a way, but it is also uplifting, and a challenge to ourselves to do our best, an empowering experience for mothers whether your birth is vaginal or by cesarean. A system that chains you to cables that are not always necessary, that encourages mothers to lose control of their lower body (and drugs newborns in the process) when is not always necessary, that requires you to birth on a bed (hey! So much for gravity! Beds are for sleeping, not for working hard) ... Doesn't seem so mother friendly, more "medical staff" friendly. I am no cow, I will birth where I want, how I want, when I want as long as my child and myself are safe and healthy. To do this, and to know that you have done it, to make informed choices rather than being pushed, to me it was priceless. To be able to nurse my newborn in my bed, to sleep and let my baby sleep as long as we wanted after the effort of being born, this was priceless too (no well-meaning nurses coming around to do whatever blood tests and vaccinations was required at unspeakable times just because "that's the schedule and procedure", to hurt my child when he/she has barely recovered from a pretty hard time, and where you are not always asked for agreement - it can be done later, if needed or wanted). Is it hard? Yes. Is it painful? In a way, but much (MUCH) worse if you are tense, feeling vulnerable, with a mind that is focused on the surroundings rather than your own body. Home or hospital? It doesn't matter, but make sure you have someone like Sunshine apart from your birth parter, someone you can rely on, to help you concentrate on what really matters, to make you feel safe and in control. Your birth partner will be too busy with you to deal with anything else.
Best of all, to see Sunshine's face coming to check our daugther and myself the day after, three days after, a week after... How much is this worth? A lifetime good memory of a birth. Boy, I wish I could sell this to every mother on Earth! I am so so lucky, and gratefull.
There is so much more I could write. Get Sunshine, hold onto her hand, read and inform yourself as much as you can, prepare your body and your mind and enjoy the challenge knowing that you have the best support by your side. Thanks Sunshine, may you help many more mothers become even stronger :). read more