I wish I read the REAL Yelp reviews before I came here ... but I was blinded by a recommendation from one of my online groups, so silly ol me didnt do my due diligence.
I really really really hate to sound like I am bashing, but I would also hate for other people to not know whats up and waste the best time on their vacation like we did. We were here for the weekend, and the "cruise" was for 7-830 pm, so it was prime time and we wasted it.
The experience:
We went with the "sunset cruise" under the assumption that this would be the more relax and perhaps romantic option. $30 + tax per person. I may as well used those dollar bills as tissue paper, and it would've served a better purpose. As soon as we boarded, we knew something was amiss. The top deck was full. Like, pre-covid type of full. So we go to the second deck. All outdoor seating were full also. We managed to find a spot on one side of the second deck ... but that also filled up quickly. By the time we set sail, we were surrounded by people and my foot has gotten ran over by a baby stroller.
The "cruise" was 20, minutes late. So, we didnt get back till later, and we were struggling to find a restaurant for dinner after that.
The "live" music was horrible. I mean, the guitarist was on point, but whoever was singing sang off key so much, it was painful. They also took so many breaks, I think at one point they had a very nervous and awkward passenger sang one song, and I mean, it may have been fun for them, but definitely not for us. Then ... OMG the sound system in the entire place was just as bad as the first busted stereo system I had in my old 1992 pontiac sunfire back in college. I mean, BUSTED like Charlie Sheen's career busted. I mean, BUSTED like your ex's face. Then, the playlist? The songs they sang were so old, my grandmother was still in elementary school when these songs came out. The whole time, Im like FEEEECCCKKKKKKK get me out of here!
So, the first 20 minutes, we were outside. Okay, cool, yeah, theres the sunset, shoo bee doop doop ... then you realize that there's really no view. No qualms there. So it gets boring, and the music was NOT jamming, plus the temperature drops - it gets cold AND at the sunset cruise, once it is dark, there are no views. So, we went inside (on the 2nd floor). PACKED LIKE SARDINES inside. I guess everyone else decided to come in. It was depressing. There was just a bunch of bored folks desperately searching for an escape through their phones. A BUNCH of UNMASKED folks drinking from buckets of beers. So, mind you, this was only like 30 minutes into the ride. So we sat inside for another hour. There mustve been at least 100 people there with us (I legit counted), and besides me and boo, maybe two other people had their mask on. The rest has left it up to Jesus if they were to get sick or get other people sick.
Carpets were so old, I think they ordered this from when they were building the hotels and casino in OLD las vegas. Im not kidding - they have the same carpet ... so that was like, oh I dont know, 50 years ago or more? The chairs and tables and everything else is probably just as old, if not older. Now, nothing wrong with the classic - but you gotta keep it clean and still aesthetically pleasing to some degree - to which, there was none of that here.
And the creme de le creme of this epic ride? They played that lame ass played out song Cupid Shuffle and a couple others like it on their BUSTED ass system! BLARING it like "OOOOH HOW FUN!"
Damn - my chest hurts reliving that experience.
I have done a ton of river cruises and this is THE worst I have ever been to. The staff and crew were friendly, I have nothing against that - but the whole thing was not even worth a dollar. I mean, if you really must, do the Duck Tours - that's really all you would need to experience "the river".
So Im sorry to the folks that work here and make their living doing this, but for us who also make a living to vacation and have good experiences in their vacation, I cannot, in good conscience, recommend this at all.
What will make this better?
Fix the sound system. Update/major clean up/re do paint, upholstery, tables, chairs, windows- something like that from top to bottom. Really focus and identify WHO your target audience is so you can put together a show/talent that is relevant to them. Make it more engaging by not only focusing on one side of the boat. Be more mindful of covid guidelines. Have staff walk around and check on folks periodically on this 1.5-2 hour "cruise". Brighten it up! I mean, get a professional (dare I say, millennial) event planner and interior designer. I'm sure they can bring this whole thing up to the speed of the year 2021. This whole boat cruise is such a great idea and addition to the city, but the whole things needs a major haul for it to be a true success. Word of mouth travels. It cant stay like this for too long. Best of luck! read more