Susan: I wish we could afford a place in the Hamptons. Everybody…read more whos anybody has one. Hobie: Yeah, but if youre somebody whos nobody, its no fun to be around anybody whos everybody. - "Melinda and Melinda" Though he predates the 1% debate and Chuck Bass, Woody Allen had some serious insights into the world of Manhattan's elite... and non-elite. While nowadays almost any mid-level trader or PR twentysomething has a share house in the Hamptons during the summer months, it's only a certain kind of family that owns out east. And within that already ultra exclusive club, there are only a certain echelon that belong to the private beach clubs stretching along the white sand beaches on the Eastern edges of this long island. Fortunately for me, I managed to meet a few of these fancy folks and through their generosity I gained access to the notoriously snooty and closed access golf compound and private family club in East Hampton. The Maidstone is one of the oldest golf clubs in the east and boasts an 18-hole course. Since I'm more beach bum than caddy shacker, I indulged in the water sports and beach cafe on my visit. The cold bar offers made-to-order salads freshly chopped before your eyes. The grill had some tantalizing sandwiches and burgers, but again being a private club you can only dine here with a member so leave the cash at home. The private beach is perfectly serene, complete with chairs and umbrellas ready for a day of lounging while the massive pool seemed more family friendly with children splashing away. Be sure to order up a signature Maidstone cocktail (basically a rich man's Long Island Iced Tea) and check out the upper deck views of the Atlantic and surrounding beach. The clubhouse itself is nice, classy and pure Hamptons style. We didn't really meet anyone new, and the only diversity you'll find is in the kitchen. It's clear that families have been coming out here for generations and they are wary of strange faces. It was fun to live like the 1% for a day, but in the end I think I prefer a sandy day brown-bagging it in the Rockaways. For those looking for a more exclusive experience, and some of the world best golf spots, then perhaps you can wiggle your way in here.

EKS Golf helped me more with my golf swing than any other lesson I've had. Eric uses a state of the…read moreart golf simulator that shows you your golf swing. The simulator allows you to see exactly what is happening with your golf swing with surprising precision. Using the data, Eric guides you in what you need to do to correct your lousy swing. Voila! I'm a golfer!

From the owner: Golf lesson available open rrrrrrrread more

Seriously good club music. Bowling ally is well lid and clean…read more Came here for a private party. Saw Chris Cuomo and promptly took selfies and garnished envy from West Coast friends. DJ plays cool music. Young people and old people are able to coexist and dance to cool tunes. Best drinks are always free drinks. Tao's family kept the good drinks flowing and they were free and tasty. I had a blast. Came with friends. Made some new friends. And danced until my feet hurt. Wish I was wearing white (Alas I am not used to white attire as I am not a local!)

Awful experience. Full of underage people. No re entry. AC was the main issue, it was insanely hot…read more Awful experience. Paid hundreds to party in a ghetto warehouse. Nowhere to sit and no AC. Save urself the trouble and don't go here.

If you like dodging exercise equipment, rejected old lounge furniture and cases of beer to play…read morepickleball, then I guess this is your place. Add to that the total disorganization of the staff--they called me twice and emailed once asking for payment--when I had already paid--- and the bully of an owner, who personally called me to accuse my son of breaking the weight bench (why was there a weight bench two feet from the pickleball court is a question that remains unanswered) and wound up threatening to file a police report for something he ultimately texted to say was easily fixed--and you have a place that we'll never, ever visit again. Classless, rude, tacky, subpar facility,

Not a good experience. Do not recommend - find a different place to spend your money. Very…read moredisappointed by the management and front desk.

I was made fun of my race. The staff were slow. The food was very slow and not great. Do not come…read morehere trust me.

Perfect spot to rent a hobie car sailboat for an hour on Fort Pond. Remember they are cash-only!…read moreYou can leave your essentials at the front desk with he friendly staffer. We had no trouble getting one mid-day Friday, and the weather cooperates with a nice wind. $50 might seem steep, but it was worth it for the 3 of us to get out on the water and for my daughter to learn how to captain. The dude at the dock made sure my wife could control the boat and gave us a little guidance, then we were on our way to some light sailing fun. Most boat rentals in Montauk seem to be for bigger or motorized craft, so look for what suits you.

Played a game of crazy gold with the kids and then rented a hobie cat and sailed around the lake-…read moreloads of fun. What a great place! Reasonable prices.