My first visit was with Derrick and he took the time to listen to ALL of my problems and understand and listen to what I was saying. He asked questions and answered mine. He had asked me what I'd been through before, which was 20 years of pain, but it has gotten worse, and I've had more things happen. He was ready to help me, and not with the same things that didn't work for me anymore. My second visit, they didn't tell me the name of the doctor, but (forgive me if I'm wrong) she seemed Indian or something along those lines and had black straight hair just below her shoulder line, if that helps. She flipped through my papers and didn't stop to read anything. She interrupted me. She didn't listen. She named things that I have done for years, for example: tens units, stimulator in my back, injections, chiropractors, deep massage therapy, lots of physical therapy, facet injections and so much more. In 2002, I got dragged down the road and ran over by my ex-mother-in-laws truck from my shoulder blades, up. That's when it all started and I ended up in a pain center for 10 years, on clonazepam 4mg per day, due to psychogenic seizure, muscle relaxers, opioids, etc... and that's when they did all of the other stuff (tens units and the other above explained things). She told me they can't help me because I'm on clonazepam. A very LOW dose of only 1 1/2 mgs a day for my seizures. She said take Tylenol and lidocaine patches that do absolutely nothing!!!! I've been there and done that for years. Diclofenac sodium. Those things I started with and moved to the other stuff. I asked my doctor if I could go to a place closer, in Sidney, and they told me they didn't want to send me there because they only do the things I've already been through and they want me to get comfort with my pain and feel I need opioids to help me. This has literally ruined my life at age 44 and I can't even do simple things at home, with my family, go to the store. The only thing I do is go to appts and that is it. That is painful enough. There excuse is I'm on clonazepam, but it's so low it doesn't even show up in my urine all the time. When I left the pain center before (a different one), I went to a suboxone clinic, so I wouldn't withdrawal, obviously, and I definitely didn't want to go to the streets. It's scary that you go to doctors for help and they don't want to help you and people end up on the streets and die of overdose because they can't get the help that they need. SAD!!! I still went to the suboxone center, even after, I stopped taking the suboxone. I go for counseling and psychiatry. I have since had a rotator cuff surgery, which went well, but 2 weeks into it, my bicep completely tore from my largest tendon in my right upper arm and I had a great surgeon. He thought I was just having some pain from the rotator cuff surgery and another tear and some bone spurs that he fixed, but that wasn't the case. After time passed, he said that he felt he needed to do some tests. Unfortunately, that is when he found the bicep situation and had to drill through my bone and put in a button and screws and such, called a tenodesis. The problem was that this is something that needed to be fixed within 2-3 months and due to the wait, it didn't happen for 6 months. My arm is deformed and I can only use my arm from the elbow down, but as time goes, the pain gets worse. They had me on strong pain medication for 117 days and since they weren't a pain center, they asked my regular physician to take over the medicine and to get me into a pain center. I was told, per the surgeon and physician, the pain center was going to take over, so I could stay on it and not have to switch doctors. Since I spoke with the second doctor, everything changed. It was not what was discussed at the first visit. So, now, I am back on bupinorphine/suboxone-naloxone and in pain at the suboxone clinic. Right back where I started before all of these surgeries that I had this past year. I was a nurse and a teacher and my whole life got ripped away from me. I have 8 grandkids and 7 of them are ages 5 and under and ever since all of this, my grandkids have not been as close to me because I can't do what I used to do with them, even if it was limited. Now, I can barely do anything and I can barely get through one day without crying in pain. This specific doctor wants to do a nerve block. I was watching my grandkids during the week while my kids worked, and now, I have one. The only reason I have her is because she just turned 11 months and isn't walking quite yet, and I can lift her with my left arm. Yes, it's painful, but I don't have a choice and this child had no other options. I can't fold laundry. I can't do dishes. I can't look up/down or left/right due to the metal in my cervical spine. These other issues have caused my whole upper body to be drastically worse. Trouble walking from my knees and hips. I'm just ready to give up at this point. If doctors don't care, why should I??? read more
