"Welcome to Coffee Talk. I'm your host, Linda Richmond." (Mike Myers, SNL)
The village name of Flåm elicits all manner of sophomoric jokes by English speakers that make it a bit difficult to swallow any café, bakery, or restaurant name with "Flåm" in it.
Having said that, we had no difficulties downing all the tasty pastries, cookies, muffins, traditional Norwegian breads, and sandwiches baked by the talented team at Flåm Bakeri. In fact, all the treats we devoured here were so good that I'm getting a little verklempt just thinking about it.
"Talk amongst yourselves. I'll give you a topic."
Skoleboller. The word skoleboller translates into 'school buns', unless you're Linda Richmond. Then it's a condition your friend has developed in his genechtagazoink.
But these aren't just any old buns at any old bakery. They're the Norwegian buns of champions, and this is the place to try them. The cardamom-scented sweet rolls that have been filling kids' lunch boxes since the 50's are filled with an eggy, golden vanilla custard (or jams in some variations), glazed with sugar icing, and then usually sprinkled with flaked coconut. They tasted like buttah, as Linda would say, but they're also just fun to pronounce.
Skoleboller in general are very filling, chewy, and anything but light and delicate. The buns here were no exception, in zaftig proportions about the size of a toddler's head--plenty to share with your bubbala if you're a real Mensch. But no one would fault you if you were to horde it in your tote bag instead, and nibble on it all day in secret. Just wipe the icing and coconut off your lips when you're done. It's a dead giveaway otherwise.
If you're looking for coffee to wash down the pastries, I would get it at the Marina Cafe instead. The bakery uses an automated coffee machine to deal with insane train and cruise tourist traffic in summer, and it wasn't good. I had to dump my cup after a few sips.
"Oy Vey!"
The bakery is next to the train station building and the ferry entrance, so the mobs fresh off the boats and trains will pick over the selection quickly. Get there early or designate some other poor sap to do the early bird bakery run. There isn't much for seating, so expect this to be a grab and go situation.
This is the only bakery in Flam, but it is worth a visit...or three. All the pastries we tried here were excellent, but you simply must experience the skoleboller. We made a point of sampling them in every bakery we visited on our trip, and these were by far the best. Just get your refreshments elsewhere.
I give it four hearty toasts of L'Chaim.
*This review is dedicated to Barbra Joan Streisand read more