This hotel feels like the end result of years of understaffing and cost-cutting, where management decided it was easier to lower standards than improve the product.
We were first greeted by a parking lot that made Alderaan look like a salt flat. After checking in, we discovered the bellhop cart we had just loaded with luggage was completely useless because our room was on the second floor -- and there's no elevator. So we repacked the car and drove roughly 500 metres across what can only be described as the surface of the moon to another entrance, featuring a door that has almost certainly claimed a few fingers over the years. Unfortunately, that prediction turned out to be accurate. During our stay, the door slammed shut on the hand of a little girl in our party with enough force that she required surgery and seven stitches.
After climbing a staircase scented with powdered carpet cleaner and decorated with what appeared to be a rat bait trap from the 1990s, we finally arrived at our room.
At first glance, it looked fairly standard: two queen beds, a TV, a mini fridge, a motion sensor hanging halfway off the wall, dirty floors, mattresses that felt sourced from the Salvation Army, and an air conditioner that sounded like it stopped being manufactured shortly before Y2K. Impressively, the mini fridge was somehow even louder.
To the hotel's credit, after checking thoroughly, we did not find any bed bugs.
This luxury establishment also advertises a pool. Although I'm not sure "pool" is the correct term when you can't actually see the bottom.
On our second morning, we learned that housekeeping only happens if specifically requested, which makes sense considering I'm fairly certain they only employ one housekeeper for the entire building.
The room keys also demagnetize if they so much as make eye contact with a cellphone, and the front desk handed out replacement keys without asking for any proof that I was actually staying in the room I claimed was mine.
Overall, this stay felt less like a hotel experience and more like a live demonstration of what happens when maintenance, staffing, and basic standards are treated as optional expenses. read more
