Crossing the border into Canada this weekend was a joke. I got on the wrong lane and ended up with a Canadian "patriot" (like the ones in the US, except in Canadian), explaining to me I was entering Canada and I should have respect for his country. Uhm, okey dokie? The officer tried so hard to intimidate me, while I had no clue why he was going on with the Canada thing. He got irritated as I answered his questions peacefully, kindly and with a smile. I was trying to be friendly and cooperative.
So he sent me to secondary inspection .... just because he felt like it. At secondary inspection a pair of characters that looked like Beavis and Butt-head came over to do a thorough inspection of me and my car, as the "Canadian patriot" had messaged them to do so. Beavis (skinny blond with pimples) kept asking me if my car was stolen. I thought he was joking so I didn't respond the second time he asked that. He then turned with a serious look on his face and said "your silence is not an answer", so I answered 'no'. He asked repeatedly if I had ever been to jail, when I responded 'no' he was getting upset too. I thought the excessive questioning was odd: stolen car, jail, etc.
Beavis then told me to go inside their office building. There I was to face a little bitchy woman who tried so hard to intimidate me as well. I smiled at her and she lost it too. She looked like Stan's mean sister Shelly from South Park, the one with the braces. First thing she does is yell at me for not wearing a mask, like "this is Canada, don't you know our rules". I explained to Shelly that Beavis and Butt-head had sent me there and I was simply following their orders.
I came back with my mask, she asked me also if my car was stolen and why I was headed to Toronto. She then asked me if I was trying to get a job in Canada. Seriously, WTF Canada!!! All I wanted is to go on a road trip, meet a friend in Toronto, and spend money in the province. I kept thinking how these people go home and interact with their loved ones, super creepy.
Out of the blue Shelly told me I was free to go. Yipeee! As I was exiting I saw a Mexican guy who spoke no English and was struggling with another agent trying to communicate. I felt bad for him so I told him I'd help him and began translating and helping him fill the ArriveCAN form. The other agent asked me "are you Spanish?" I responded "no, I'm an American" lol. Not the brightest bunch. The Mexican guy just wanted to go back to the US, and quite frankly after dealing with these characters I don't blame him! I translated his entire communication with the agent, he thank me profusely, while all the agents just looked angry, bitter, confused. It takes a Mexican guy to show compassion, probably something none of these agents had ever seen before.
I'll be thinking twice before crossing the border into Canada again, so much to see in Michigan without having to deal with these clowns at customs. read more