I'm leaving this review based on my firsthand experience during a church trip and my interactions with the pastor, his wife, and the group's leadership.
Before the trip, my girlfriend and I were told that we would be allowed to stay together in a tent. However, later during the trip, that arrangement changed. The pastor said he didn't want us staying in the tent because he was concerned about what might happen between my girlfriend and me. This was especially strange to me because there were four of us staying in the tent. He also made a comment implying that having other people in the tent would not have stopped him personally. Honestly, I found that comment disgusting and extremely inappropriate. Hearing a pastor make a comment like that, especially in that context, made me very uncomfortable and changed the way I viewed him as a leader.
We were also threatened with being kicked out and were told we might have to get on a speedboat in complete darkness around midnight. The pastor's wife told us that the situation was becoming too dangerous and that they did not want to send their leaders out to deal with it. The way this was communicated felt extremely dismissive and hostile rather than caring about our safety.
The situation became even worse when the pastor yelled at my girlfriend for around an hour and made her cry. During the argument, he called her a fake Christian. I eventually told him that he needed to apologize to her. Instead, he told me that I needed to apologize for him because he was too busy to do it himself. I found that extremely disrespectful, especially considering that he was the person who had caused the situation in the first place.
The following day, the pastor's wife pulled my girlfriend aside and told her that she needed to break up with me. She called me a terrible person and a loser and told my girlfriend that she was setting herself up for failure because I was raised not Christian. I found it deeply inappropriate for church leadership to involve themselves in our relationship and attempt to influence my girlfriend into breaking up with me.
There were also things I witnessed that made me uncomfortable with the way the group approached religion and fear. At one gathering, a young person was having a panic attack after speaking in front of a crowd while dealing with the loss of their parents. The pastor brought up the devil during the situation and encouraged people to reaffirm their faith because of what had happened. Given that the person was already going through a difficult and emotional moment, I felt that the situation could have been handled with more compassion and sensitivity.
At another meetup, the pastor said that girls are not as close to God and that they have to speak through their man. That was another statement that I found deeply concerning and disrespectful.
Overall, my experience was not one of feeling welcomed, supported, or spiritually encouraged. I experienced what felt like intimidation, public pressure, personal attacks, interference in relationships, and leadership using fear to influence people. I also left with concerns about the group being heavily focused on money, although I recognize that this is my personal impression rather than something I can prove.
I'm not writing this review because I disagree with Christianity or because I expect everyone to share my beliefs. I'm writing it because of how I personally experienced the behavior of the leadership. People deserve to be treated with respect, especially when they are vulnerable or upset. Based on my experience, I would strongly encourage anyone considering getting involved with this church to pay close attention to how the leadership treats people who disagree with them or question their decisions. read more
