TLDR: This practice left my son in pain, refusing to finish treatment after already numbing him. The dentist blamed me, not accepting any responsibility for her uninformed/ableist patient management techniques, hurting/restraining my child, or refusing to accept any info I desperately tried to give her.
To summarize, I was stuck between complying with this practice's strict child isolation policies, or making my son wait for over a month with a toothache to be seen elsewhere. Before the appointment, the doctor refused to speak to me about my 7 year-old son's ASD and dental anxiety. At the appointment, I insisted that I at least be allowed in the lobby, and was told again that it was their way or the highway. I begged again to speak to the dentist. The receptionist said "She said this isn't a negotiation and you trying to make it one will only make it worse for your son." They escorted him into the building and locked the door behind them. I sat on the floor in the breezeway to wait.
After a short time, my son began screaming loud enough for me to hear him clearly and continued for several seconds, including, "OW" and "THAT HURTS." So I banged on the door loudly since no one was in the front, wanting to know what was going on. The receptionist came into view, but would not approach the door or show me recognition, just got on the phone. So I knocked again. They apparently tried to call me, but had called my husband who couldn't answer.
At this point, the dentist brought my son out, declaring "I'm not doing this with you banging on the door. He's numb, but I'm not going to do any more work on him." My son was upset, trying to spit out the numbing gel. He had a small round smudge of blood on his jaw near his ear. We had a terse exchange, in which Dr. Ahmed said parents being allowed in the exam room is "FOR CASES OF MENTAL RETARDATION! YOUR SON ISN'T MENTALLY RETARDED!" The dentist was dismissive of son's diagnosis, stating "He's fine. He can handle it," after not letting me share his past experiences or discuss any management methods. I could not keep up with everything she said because she was talking over me so quickly.
The next day when my son was calm, I asked him in a neutral way to tell me what he remembered. I've summarized what he told me below.
He asked what they were going to do, they told him he's too young for them to tell him. They ignored further q's from him.
He said he wasn't ready, they started anyway.
They held his hands down too hard, forced the numbing gel into his mouth on the wrong side, ignored his words of pain, physically kept him from getting up, and restrained his head to inject lidocaine.
While I know a 7 year-old's recollection is to be taken with a grain of salt, I have to believe him because I wasn't allowed in to see what happened.
Dr. Ahmed showed an appalling ignorance about ASD, namely that because my son is verbal and intelligent that he doesn't need accommodations. ASD is unique to each child, and if the dentist had taken the time to listen, she would learn that my son has an extreme fear of needles, that being restrained by a stranger is a HUGE trigger in his anxiety and his behavior, and that I have worked WITH dentists in the past to help complete treatments in the least traumatic way possible. She also does not use the Tell/Show/Do method widely accepted as best practice. I was told by the receptionist to describe the procedure in infantile language, like "sleepy juice" instead of injection, and "shine the teeth" instead of drill. And according to my son, they wouldn't even answer his questions. Anyone who knows about ASD will tell you these kids need to know what to expect and don't handle the unexpected well.
Everything we experienced at West County Pediatric Dentistry was in stark contrast to what is on their site. None of the promises of respect, care, time and communication were upheld to us. I hope my account helps other parents make informed decisions about their children's care. read more
