An appointment had been made at the Hulse, Playfair, and McGarry West Chapel following the death of my father. There was a very lengthy wait, before being greeted by their designated "Funeral Preplanning Counsellor", Anna Silverman, who we soon discovered was essentially a "funeral salesperson", under a different title. In fact, various online funeral websites describe a "Funeral pre-planning counsellor" as "a salesperson" in which "their role involves arranging and selling funeral and cemetery products and services to individuals and families". Therefore, your description/title assigned to Anna would be akin to describing a McDonald's sales associate/clerk as a "nutritional advisor". At no time did Anna provide any semblance of care, concern, counselling, or compassion. Anna began by briefly explaining the funeral process and suggested numerous potential services, all at exorbitant additional costs. For example, she had suggested that we would want to have the funeral service recorded and livestreamed, at an additional cost of $350 (which ended up being $375) for those unable to attend the service. [Incidentally, at no time did Anna ever request my contact information, nor was she ever interested in obtaining this information. However, I did provide this to her, at my insistence. Perhaps it is due to this obvious disregard for my involvement, as one of three siblings, that she neglected to send me the livestream video link for my family members (including my daughter) and other mourners, as little as 24 hours prior to the funeral service. I had to call and write in order to obtain this information, which was eventually provided by Mr. Moss (Manager).] Round candles were also to be provided at a cost of $55 each, along with many other suggested extras by this eager salesperson, who seemed more intent on making greater commission by promoting unnecessary services and products, rather than consoling and assisting us. There were so many add-ons recommended, pulling at our heart strings, that I thought this sales pitch would never end. Within minutes of sitting down to meet with her, Anna escorted us to the casket room. I informed her, as per tradition, that we wanted "a simple pine box" for our loved one, of which Anna should be aware as the expert,
"The tradition of using a plain pine box for Jewish funerals is rooted in Jewish beliefs and customs. It symbolizes equality in death, as all people are equal in the eyes of God. The pine box is made entirely of wood with no metal components and is designed to decompose naturally, allowing the body to return to the earth. The use of a pine box is not only a matter of tradition but also a reflection of the Jewish value system, which emphasizes simplicity and equality."
Instead of respecting and adhering to this tradition, Anna, for the sake of increased commission, took us over to view veneer or solid poplar and oak caskets that started at almost $3000 and increased in price to over $5000. I was thinking and stated at that moment, that I wish I had made my own casket as a tribute to my loved one, to which Anna quickly quipped "I doubt that you could do that", or had ordered overnight delivery from Costco (mentioned by my sister) or Amazon for similar caskets for less than $1000, which I later confirmed was a realistic option. Furthermore, I specifically asked Anna, as both me and my sister on the phone wished our father to have a "simple pine box", but she stated that these (pointing to the four fancier caskets), were the only available options for a Jewish funeral. Again, I asked, with my sister, "so you do not offer a simpler option that includes a plain pine box?" to which she immediately emphatically responded: "No". I later learned from Mr. Carchidi (GM), that there had, in fact, been other simpler and less costly options available that Anna intentionally neglected to show to us, in spite of our repeated requests and obvious disappointment.
Anna placed funeral home literature in front of us, suggesting the best packages and add-ons, and within minutes, we were clearly going to be exceeding $10,000 for our simple tribute to our loved one. This was clearly a cash grab. I expressed concern about the costs and what was or was not required, to which Anna repeatedly explained that "of course, you will want to honour your father with only the best", and other similar statements, guilting us into providing an exceptional service to memorialize and honour the memory of our father, and for the sake of the mourners. The entire process felt like a very disorganized but targetted sales presentation. I was still in the building over five minutes later, when Anna called down the stairs to inquire if I was still around. (continued in next review) read more
