Dear Mr President…read more
When you campaigned a few months back you promised to change things in Washington. You have been working on the Economy, I know it must be a tough job, you have started on Health Care, which has to be nigh on impossible, you are ending your presence in that appalling war, which must be a thankless task, you are dealing with centuries of enshrined American homophobia (NO wait, you're not are you, despite your promises to we the colorful second-class residents of the US) .... so, I was just wondering if you might be able to spare a moment or two to deal with some things at the US Consulate General office in Halifax:
(1) Instead of us having to herd like cattle into a narrow, dark and steamy hallway, could you think of buying a few chairs for us to sit on and maybe a little air conditioning. The lights go off every 30 minutes, which given the 3 hour wait we spent quite some time in darkness;
(2) The photos of you and Hilary are somewhat understated and currently hanging over what appears to be the photocopier. While this may have been appropriate for Mr Bush, you deserve at least to hang over the wooden filing cabinet. We would also love to see Michelle up there as well - you two are gorgeous;
(3) The opening hours are rough - especially when the 'appointments' run two - three hours late. It would be much nicer if you set up tressle tables by the harbor during summer months with a few volunteers helping out. I would be happy to assist - though my not being a citizen might pose a problem;
(4) Could we do something about the paperwork - I mean seriously, if you cut the information repetitiously gathered down by half, your Energy Policy Goals would be met in half the time, without having to woo the Germans;
(5) It really is such a waste of time having to leave the country to collect a new work-visa ... honestly, given how much work I do each day contributing to your economy, it might be nice to be able to renew online ... or have the DHS pay a house call, something cool about secret-service flashing light arrival and being frisked down by Men In Black look-alikes, you know?
So all that said ... the two stars, are for the staff, who really deserve five stars. Despite them working in silly, cramped, inefficient conditions, they were deeply respectful and polite. The security guards were helpful and the interviewers very clear in explaining the difference between an I727 and some other document I had no idea about. They even gave me Halifax tourist advice on best places to go while I waited for the visa approval machine to do its thing.
Thank you Mr Obama
Yours truly, Paul