My husband and I adopted our son in 2014, going through the entire process as clients of Adoption Connection (AC). We recommend them very highly. We decided on AC after looking at a few other agencies, but frankly not very many. After going to AC's orientation meeting, we both agreed that they just felt right, that these felt like the people and the organization we wanted to go through this process with.
What we liked about Adoption Connection, both initially and throughout the process, was their combination of real empathy and caring with very hard-headed practicality, both in logistical and bureaucratic matters and in navigating the convoluted territory between birth family and adoptive family.
A quick rundown about how we felt about them about each of the various steps in the process:
Their preparatory classes are great. The four-session introduction-to-adoption class is a crash course in a lot of what to expect in adoption, with a chance to hear from adoptive children, birthparents, and adoptive parents. It also lets you meet and connect, over the course of the class, with other people entering into the process, which is great. The transracial adoption class is very good - hard, because, especially if you're white, you have to confront things honestly on a whole new level than you may ever have had to before, if you're seriously considering adopting across racial lines - but extremely worthwhile and necessary. There's other good preparatory classes on infant care, birthfamily relations, fetus substance exposure, etc.
Writing the letter. Writing the birthmother letter is excruciating, and they do a good job of being available to give you input as you're working on it.
Waiting. Definitely one of the hardest parts. Adoption Connection frankly isn't very proactive in being supportive during this stage. They're definitely available to talk to you when you need it, and they host a good support group, but you're largely on your own here. Our wait was three years, with mostly radio silence. Our main reassurance was that they would periodically ask us for more letters, which told us that our letter was in fact going out. I was and am ok with this. The agency has limited resources, and though it's really hard waiting and waiting and waiting with very little hand-holding, when things start happening (and they happen fast when they do happen), *that's* when you really need them and *that's* when they're there. So, though it's hard, I feel like their prioritization of where they put their effort is good. If you're someone who needs super personalized attention during your wait or your search, you might want to think about working with an attorney or a facilitator. (Which you can do in conjunction with working with AC, I think.)
Once things started rolling for us, Adoption Connection was amazing. Much of navigating the relationship with the birthfamily is up to you, as it should be, but they're very available to talk to you about how it's going and to give you advice, and they're in active, frequent contact with you during this time. They're on top of all of the confusing, intimidating legal and bureaucratic aspects. In our case, the agency the birthmother was working with didn't always do a great job, and Adoption Connection totally made sure that everything was taken care of, even though our chunky fee was going to the other agency. One piece of paperwork took months to resolve, and Adoption Connection was doggedly on top of it until the matter got fixed - they were wonderful.
In the end, what I like most about Adoption Connection (after their hard-headed commitment to getting problems fixed) is that, in fact, they *don't* automatically prioritize you, the adoptive parent, in the process. Adoption involves three parties: the child, the birthfamily, and the adoptive family. Adoption Connection honors all three parties in the process, with priority always given to the ultimate interests of the baby/child. If for you, adoption is exclusively about you getting a baby, with no concern for either what being adopted means to the person your child will become or for the experience of the birthfamily, then Adoption Connection might not be the right agency for you. For me, adoption and birthfamly are integral pieces of who my son is, and as such, I cherish them for what they are and deeply appreciate Adoption Connection's commitment to the entirety of the process. Not just my, the adoptive parent's, piece of it.
Everyone we worked with at Adoption Connection is a fabulous combination of real, deep empathy and caring with real no-nonsense practicality and toughness. I feel immensely lucky to have had them facilitate our adoption. read more