Yes, hi, hello. You might want to read this…read more
I reached out to Two Hats for some help. As a small but growing business - which the website says they cater to - I was looking for a thought-partner to help me with branding, marketing, and social media. Which the website says they do. I sent an email inquiry asking for a brief phone meeting, which, you guessed it! the website says they do. I got an email back within minutes requesting more info about me and my business prior to that basic entry call. So I composed a thoughtful email with links, info about what I needed, asked if they thought we were a good fit, etc etc.
No response. Waited some more. Nada. Wrote a second email. Finally got a response. Their schedule was "very full," they said, "except for projects we like and want." How nice. Maybe put THAT on your website...?
I finally snagged a call with someone so I could get some info. The gentleman I spoke with couldn't remember the content of my email, even though he'd JUST emailed me back and told me to call him. He had no idea what I do for a living. He hadn't even looked at the links I'd sent, including my website. He sounded like he was cleaning his kitchen. He was totally distracted and disorganized. I asked if he'd read my email. He said he couldn't remember it. He then read it aloud while we were on the phone together. Great use of my time, yes? I had to repeat 5 times what I was looking for, which is super straightforward: a thought-partner to help me with branding, marketing, and social media. (I've now spoken with 2 other consulting firms. Neither had trouble grasping this concept. Both read that very same email and said it was "very clear.") The call was quite possibly the most unprofessional consult I've had in my career -- which is ironic, because they're a *consulting firm.*
After half an hour, he said he believed Two Hats could help me and that the firm does indeed do the work I was seeking. Huzzah!! He said he'd do some HW, and asked if we could schedule a call the following day. I blocked off an hour in my schedule. But at the appointed time, no call. I waited. And then waited some more. Ten minutes in, I got a text. A TEXT. The text said: "Sorry. We can't help you. We only work with advocacy organizations." Remember that dumbass, immature boyfriend you had in HS who broke up with you via text because he couldn't face a phone call?? It was like that, only this was worse, because this is a PROFESSIONAL MARKETING FIRM.
This mess is problematic for about 100 reasons, as all of you can probably tell. But let's break it down anyway, just for fun:
First of all, CALL ME. I am a potential client. We have a phone appointment that YOU asked for. I blocked off an hour of my busy life at your request.
Secondly, WHAT?! If your firm only works with advocacy orgs, SAY SO up front. Say so on your website so that potential customers don't waste their time. If you can't be bothered to update your own website, you sure as sh*t won't get access to mine. At the very least, inform your customer via phone during the initial consult after she tells you who she is and what she needs. If you don't know the limits of what your company does PRIOR to a call with a client, YOU'RE FIRED. You wasted hours of my time on research, emails, and a completely useless phone consult.
Third, this "we only work with advocacy orgs" is a complete load of horsesh*t. Their website boasts a ton of work that has nothing to do with advocacy, including work for a local fitness center and some lady who wrote book on witchcraft. (Note: THESE ARE NOT ADVOCACY ORGS.) Did you think I wasn't going to notice that you lied to my face? How unprofessional. Bad look for a marketing firm.
If we're not a fit, that's fine. Grow a pair, be respectful, call your potential client as scheduled, and tell her so. Don't waste people's time just because you have the luxury of doing so. The world doesn't revolve around your Two Hats.
Let me interrupt my eye-rolling to warn you to steer clear --
because when a consulting firm can't even get the basics of a basic consultation right, you best run for the hills.
