Being able to attend service here felt very meaningful to me being that both my mother and grandma grew up going to this church both as students and as members of the church.
It's a big beautiful building and I really felt the awe and reverence for God for most of the service. I also loved how tall the ceilings were, the images painted on them, and the colorful stain glass windows. The building was so beautiful that I barely looked at the person who was singing or the person who was preaching, but the sermon itself and the songs that were sung resonated deeply with my soul and the way that they echoed through the building gave me space to process my own feelings related to the experience and to appreciate the sacredness of my own spirituality.
Something about the bigness of the building, the smell of the incense, the reverence in the person singing and preaching, and the fact that the beautiful sounds that were made were not too loud really helped to decrease my anxiety to the point that I was able to receive the message and spirit of what was being said better than I am usually able to during a church service and I really felt the Holy Spirit in that place.
However, the strictness in some of the people regarding the holy communion really took away from the overall experience if I am being honest. As such, I would like to plead with some of the people in charge to be mindful about not doing anything that could take away from the power of Gods presence in that building.
For instance, when I went up to take communion I was under the impression that we needed to take the communion with us as we sat down and that we would all take communion together, however, at this church they expect you to eat the wafer in front of them BEFORE you sit down and I did not know that going into the experience.
For me this is a very minor difference compared to how other churches I have been to do things and is ultimately not really that big of a deal, however, I had experienced a couple people run after me as if I had stolen a large screen TV from Walmart demanding that I eat that thin wafer in front of them before I was "allowed" to sit down and I genuinely had a hard time believing that they were being serious. So did a lot of people who observed this who were with me as they were quite loud and militant in contrast with the peaceful vibe of the service.
What makes a person become so consumed with having others prove themselves to them that they value that so much more than making people feel a basic level of safety or comfort in their presence? What kind of energy compels people to obsess over such trivial details that they become distracted from the power of the message within the song and sermon itself, especially when that fixation stands in direct contrast to the very message being preached?
While I responded with "I will" assuring them I did, in fact, take this symbolic practice seriously, a woman still judgmentally and angrily snarled at me that "I need to do it now" as she glared at me with such disgust and disdain it made me wonder why she would even bother being in any kind of church in the first place, especially since everything about Jesus resists that kind of energy.
After the service, several of my friends reached out to me asking if I was okay after what happened, and similarly shared their shock and disapproval of how that person handled things, and unfortunately her behavior discouraged a lot of people from coming back. My grandma and mother also felt that behavioral does not, or at least should not, reflect the overall meaning and message of what that church should strive to achieve. As such, I would like to again plead with some of the people in charge to be mindful about not doing anything that could take away from the power of Gods presence in that building.
Thankfully, I have a deep enough relationship with God that I didn't fall into the trap of taking that behavior personally or broadening it to my overall concept of how I see the church, but I do worry about how people who are less deep in their faith might respond to that kind of behavior, and how much that behavior could, unfortunately, make them flee the church without being able to experience the true power of what church is actually supposed to be about.
I say this as someone who lives from a place of love and genuinely hopes that those who could benefit from church are able to find the help and healing they need. My hope is that people are not made to feel triggered, excluded, or as though they do not belong simply because they do not know every nuance of a particular denomination. Too often, petty traditions or minor differences in symbolism can become distractions from the power of genuine spiritual life in Christ, much like how the Pharisees' fixation on the Sabbath caused them to condemn Jesus rather than bask in the power of his healing glory. read more