Racist, Unwelcoming, and Shallow…read more
I remember sitting down in the front row the first time I visited Symphony. Upon seeing me, the churchgoers in the row directly behind me started to whisper hurtful and denigrating comments. In particular, one of them was laughing, saying that "a mixed race asian isn't truly asian". Being mixed race, I couldn't help but feel as though that comment was targeted towards me. I was appalled by this comment, and to this day I regret not confronting them for their hateful, bigoted remarks.
Unfortunately, the scene described above was not the only instance in which I felt alienated and excluded. Many of the groups at Symphony are cliquey college student groups, who measure your worthiness based on very superficial metrics, such as your major, what you're doing for work, and which college you're attending. They even segregate themselves based on alma mater. I am from a poor family, and I did not attend a great college, so obviously I was ignored or regarded with disdain.
I recall a conversation that I had with a visiting pastor, in which he asked me what I was majoring in, and what I wanted to do with my life. I replied that I was majoring in Liberal Arts, and that I didn't really have a plan for the future. He did not relent, even though I was clearly uncomfortable with the conversation. At last, I blurted "perhaps something in administration". After that remark, he gave me a dull and sardonic expression, as if I were the biggest idiot in the world, and walked away without saying another word. Well, I'm working in administration now, thanks to all of my hard work, no thanks to your lack of support, pastor.
After all of these events, Symphony church had the nerve to use my likeness in one of their videos, to show that they were "a diverse and welcoming community". If they are so diverse, then why is the church so ethnically homogenous? If they are welcoming, then why are the church numbers dwindling? If they are loving, then why did I feel so hated? If they are Christian, then why don't they serve the struggling communities around them? They should spend less time partying and more time helping the homeless in Mass and Cass.
If there is a god, he is not in this house. I wiped the dust off my sandals when I last departed from Symphony.
